There are three possibilities that one will say those words. Number one, when you decide to buy your very first luxury watch, and you find a very reliable store on the internet that amazingly sells absolutely real, not fake Rolex for around £100, and then realise that those were not indeed real Rolexes. That did not happen to me. Number two, when you decide to go out of your way to search and find a place that sells luxury watches’ replicas for around £100 and then purchase a kind of look-a-likes, cheaply made copies of Submariners and GMT-Masters. That also did not happen to me.
I have however chosen the less likely and arguably less stupid option, by purchasing a fake Rolex. Let me tell the story.
I have been interested in watches for a long time, but have only started actively collecting watches quite recently. My collection is comprised by watches given by my parents and family members, by more affordable watches bought earlier in my life, and by a few of my Seiko watches, which are going to be the subject of a next post. And I have been also brought to be interested in vintage and antique markets, which can, at times, provide interesting sources for watch collectors.
My fiance was the one who brought me to the market, and to the overall interesting ventures into vintage markets as a whole. Been an avid collector as well, she was the one who showed me the quite magical environment of those fantastical spaces.
During one of those markets, I have found this small stall, with a glass case full of trinkets, stuff, and watches. One in particular grabbed me. The unmistakable Pepsi bezel of a GMT-Master II. I asked if I could see it close. And then it struck me. There was no common Rolex. In fact, there wasn’t a Rolex at all.
From afar, the bezel would full the majority of watch enthusiasts, but a quick glance pulled the curtain and showed what was a weird, uncanny valley sort of object. The dial reads Submariner, the magnifying glass at 3 o’clock misplaced, the crown uneven, and the open back. Not of that is of Rolex. And I am not going into details about the movement, a Miyota-like copy, unfinished and unpolished, with a audacious and flashy rotor depicting Rolex’s branding and logo. At this point, any watch connoisseur is shouting in anger and awe at the fact that even seeing all of if, all of the treacherous and ridiculous attempt of this copy to try and fool me, I still went out of my way to buy it.
Yes, and there are a few reasons for it. First of all, I bought it because it was a novelty, an interesting thin I found in the wild, an oddity that would have been bought by someone else thinking it was a real Rolex, and be worn as so.
Second reason, I found this watch at a vintage market, not in a specialised (in fakes) store or seller. The person who were selling it to me was a newcomer to the world of antiques in general, and of watches in particular. He did not know what that watch was copying, and told me that he had bought a box of antiques to start his business, and a few watches came along, including the fake Rolex. He was not trying to sell me a Rolex, nor a Rolex copy; he was simply showcasing an antique he happened to find in a box of trinkets in an abandoned house.
And finally, the third reason why I bought a rake Rolex. Because I knew what it was. Yes, I was not mislead, I didn’t fall for the sellers blabber, I didn’t think I was buying a Rolex. I got it because that is now a mark, a symbol of what not to buy, of what not to look for, and for what not to desire for a watch enthusiast.
Most replicas and fakes will put you down around at least a couple hundred pounds. Compared to the actual value of the real thing (a Submariner would start around £6,000), to pay £200 is a bargain. However, I have paid close to a quarter of that amount. It was a bargain within a bargain. For a mistake, or an anti-role model, I believe I did well.
Most replicas and fake attempts also tend to leave a bad taste on the collector’s mouth and wrist. Even though the copy looks exactly like the original, in your heart of hearts you know, and will always know, it is not the real deal. It can look the same, it can feel the same, it can even sound the same, but when you look down on your wrist, is like looking at Grand Moff Tarkin in Rogue One. It is a perfect replica, a complete recreation of the original, it walks, stands, brood, and speaks like the original, but it will never be flesh and presence of Peter Cushing. It looks good, and will fool the less prepared, but the longer you look at it, the more differences and mistakes you see.
Not this one. This is like comparing the amazingly fun and brilliant Brendan Fraser’s Mummy, with the, uninspiring to say the least, Mummy reboot. It is clear that there is a chasm between the two. One is full of joy and care, whilst the other is a paint-by-numbers, cash-grab, “fake” recreation.
Nonetheless, as Tom Cruise definitely sees the remake as a lesson, I too see this silly purchase as a masterclass on what is out there, trying to fool us all. Some with more success, some with less, way less so.
The Column Wheel 